Dreaming BIG for me is a relatively new concept. I've never been one to spend time on "nonsense" like that. Not sure why.. but I've always felt that dreaming big dreams was kinda silly and immature. Over the past few years, in an attempt to help others, I've slowly starting dreaming big myself. I've began making plans for my future, plans that are big and exciting. Now it is just apart of who I am. I think that no matter if we are a big dreamer or not, we all want success. We all have this idea in our head of what success looks like, especially for those working towards improving their health. We dream of fitting into that specific size, looking a certain way in a swimsuit or simply having that feeling of confidence. There is nothing wrong with setting goals and dreaming big but I think if we aren't careful we get so caught up in the end result that we fail to see the importance of the journey that we are currently on.This is especially so when we experience setbacks and failure. Failure could easily be my middle name these days. Every step I take forward I feel I'm taking two back. Have you ever felt that way? Like there are obstacles constantly standing in your way of achieving what you want?

 I had an Aha! moment recently that completely changed my perspective. It was a moment where I was being particularly hard on myself for just not having it together (I mean seriously, do any of us ever REALLY have it together?) In that moment, God whispered to my heart It's all in the journey.. you are a work in progress. I was kinda taken aback by that. I stopped and paused.. and for the first time I saw things a little more clearly. What if life is less about getting to that Big Goal and more about who we become in the process? Stop and think about that for a moment. All those trails.. all the struggles and obstacles.. what if they are less about preventing you from getting to your goal and more about God's way of shaping you and molding you to be the person HE wants you to be. Isaiah 64:8 says, "But now, O Lord, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are all the work of your hand." God wants us to grow in our spiritual maturity. He wants us to become more Christ like and to live out the plan he has for us but often times we don't grow unless we are placed in situations that put us under a little pressure. It's in those tense moments that we become stronger and grow closer to him. Do I think God causes the turmoil in our life? Absolutely not. But, I do believe he allows certain things to happen so we have a reason to lean on him and depend on him instead of on our own strength. I love Rick Warren's perspective of this. He says, "Everything that happens to a child of God is father-filtered, and he intends to use it for good even when Satan and others mean it for bad."

So, what if the next time we run into an obstacle that is standing between us and our goals we take a step back and look at it through new eyes? What if we use our setbacks as opportunities to spend more time in prayer?  One thing I've learned from this is that I'm never going to be perfect and as much as I try, I'm going to fail, BUT.. that's okay! God doesn't love us for what we do or don't do. Our mistakes don't make him love us any less. God loves us just the way we are, our messes and all. What a relief right?!

I have a minor serious addiction to chocolate. It's something I struggle with on the regular. Sometimes I feel it's hardwired within me because I just can't seem to shake it. I'm the mom that is shoveling chocolate chips (don't worry, their dark chocolate.. better for you right?!) in her mouth in shear desperation as she heads up stairs to begin the daunting task of the bedtime routine. On a really bad day, it comes in the form of a brownie, pouring over it like it's going to make things better. It never does. When I do give in, it's often met with me feeling unsatisfied and most likely guilt, especially if I didn't workout that day. Have you ever felt that way? Like there is this emptiness inside you, a void that needs to be filled? For some, it may not be chocolate, it may be the feeling like nothing is ever good enough; you are always looking for more, to be better, to be richer. It's got to be human nature, right? To always crave something?  I'm just one of the lucky ones that craves the stuff that makes your butt and hips grow.

In Matthew 19, the bible tells a story about a rich man. He came to Jesus, following all the commandments but still feeling like he was missing something in his relationship with God. Despite following all the "rules" he still felt that void. He asked Jesus in Matthew 19:20, "What do I still lack?" Jesus replies "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me." (Matthew 19: 21). The man then walks away sad because he was wealthy and not willing to give up the one thing that he truly loved. If you look up the word "lack" in the Thesaurus you will find words like "unsatisfied" "incomplete" and "deprived of". At first glance it's easy to take this story at face value, we may even judge this rich guy for choosing his wealth over Jesus.When I read this I couldn't help but wonder what if Jesus wasn't talking about JUST money? What if he was talking about anything standing in our way of a true and meaningful relationship with Him. We live in a world of abundance. We can have anything we want, when we want it, even a cheeseburger at 2am. In our world I think it's so easy to become consumed with everything around us, all the social media, entertainment, and even food options that we have at our finger tips. All that noise can distract us and if we aren't careful we try to use those "things" to fulfill what we are truly craving, a relationship with Jesus Christ. 

Just like me reaching for the chocolate chips after a stressful day, it's easy to reach for comfort in the things around us. It can be a slippery slope,  especially when it comes to trying to fulfill the voids deep within our heart. I know for me, the comfort from that brownie is only temporarily.. depending on how fast I devour it, the guilt sets in and the void is back. I'm not saying that I have it all figured out, but what if the next time we felt that void.. that incomplete, unsatisfied, lacking void deep within our hearts we reached for something more substantial? What if we put the brownie down.. or maybe that credit card and stopped trying to fill that void with things and started filling that void with Jesus? Matthew 5:6 says “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied." God takes delight in our desire to draw closer to him. Reach for him first and he will satisfy your heart. We don't have to seek for worldly things to give us what we need. Our Father in heaven is just a call away, eager to comfort us and give us everything we need, when we need it.