I’ve had quite the bout of writers block. It’s not that I haven’t been inspired or interested in writing… it just seems that when I sit down to write the words don’t want to come.  It occurred to me that I need to close a door before moving forward. It’s taken me a year.. an amazing year of growth and life lessons to feel like I can confidently close a door from my past and move forward in the direction I know in my heart I need to go. I come to you today with an open heart and some honesty.. and maybe some apologies along the way as well.

In 2012  God was faithful and put an amazing dream in my heart. He planted a desire to help other women deep within me and helped me take the baby steps I needed to do that. As many of you know, I’ve been a Beachbody coach for several years. You’ve watched my own journey as I began running and then working towards my fitness goals. I was blessed with the opportunity to reach out to many on their own health and fitness journeys and it was through that process that I learned to love others. I learned to have compassion and an awareness for other women’s needs,  the ones that go deeper than the surface issues we like to focus on. I ran with the opportunity. I sacrificed everything I had for it,  my time, my children and even my marriage. I was driven and moving towards my dream. While there were tough days, I moved forward. I was content with the plan that I thought God had for my life. It wasn’t until this time last year that I was confronted with the reality that God had something different in mind for me and that Beachbody and this phase of my life was only a stepping stone to something bigger. Last fall, God made it very clear he wanted me to step away from my business. With the new year, I was to scale back and to focus on the change coming for my family. He wanted me still… he wanted me present.. He wanted me devoted completely to Him. The day that I knew I was being called to leave my business behind was a devastating one. I cried. It was not going to be easy, but I did. I scaled back… but I still held on. I guess you can say I was halfway obedient. It’s taken a year for God to work on my heart, to teach me some lessons and help me to finally let go.

I love Beachbody and the opportunities it presents for other people. Whether it be through coaching or through the tools they provide others to help them become healthier, it’s a fantastic company filled with amazing people. I’ve felt like I’ve turned my back on so many people, and maybe unintentionally it’s appeared that way. However, from the bottom of my heart I still love you all so much and I’m sorry. I’ve had to step away so I could gain perspective and accept my new path.

God has used these opportunities to guide and teach me. He’s slowly revealing the plan that he has for me and it’s a terrifying yet exciting one. He’s teaching me how to love myself for who I truly am, to love April Griffin… not April the runner or April the coach or April the crossfitter. I’m learning that I’m enough just the way I am. I’m learning how to stop negative self talk and to not dwell on the areas of my life where I don’t feel like I measure up. Most importantly, He’s teaching me how to love others right where they are, in their journey. God has an amazing plan for each of us and  now I know it’s okay if they don’t all look the same. I can dance to my own special tune and so can you.

So, my beautiful friends.. as I continue on my own journey I hope this encourages you to be bold on your own. Follow YOUR heart and the dreams that YOU have. It may not be the direction everyone else is going but that’s okay. We were all made unique, with unique talents and gifts. Today I encourage you to love others and be YOU..exactly the way God made you. That’s what I plan to do. My blog may be changing in nature a little but I look forward to moving forward, continuing to encourage others and maybe even share a little wisdom that I've gathered along the way. Today I'm releasing myself from the past and all that I was and embrace Me.. the real me without labels.. without the pressure.. just me.. and finally I'm okay with that. :)

 Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. 

Phil 3:12-14